Wednesday, April 18, 2012
It's amazing that even though he is in prison at the moment and has been for more months than I care to count, how thankful he can be and it awes me that he is able to see the positive in his situation. I am happy and it warms my heart to read this in his letters.
He was vague but succinct in expressing that he has many good things happening right now and that they will all connect at some point and he looks forward to sharing them with us when we talk next.
Well....my thoughts right away takes me to what I would like to hear about his positive news....things such as.....I plan on going to a l/t treatment or 1/2 way house when I am released and go forward, turn my life around. These thoughts and hearing those words would surely make me happy and would also alleviate some of the tremors that I feel when I wonder what he will do when that time comes. At the same time and as a result of me working my program....I realize that my thoughts and my dreams have nothing to do with my son's thoughts and dreams.....and that I need to remember that. His positive news may have nothing to do with what he will do when he is released .
Darn, being codependent and caring for an addicted loved one is no walk in the park.....but nevertheless....I am glad that he is feeling joy and sharing it.